• The Atomic Grind Show
• Bling Bling
• Burton
• Carnophobia
• Evil Doers
• Miss Six-o-six
• The MTA Sucks
• Over under blues
• Park Slope Mamma
• Rat King
• The Walrus Man
• X

Come on everybody time to blow some dough
On the Atomic Grind Show

Drop some money
Grab your honey
Laugh out loud cause freaks are funny

There's a five-headed weasel in the hot snake tank
Mermaid swimming where the elephant sank

Shoot the geek
Nuke the geek
Take the geek out for a week

Bearded woman shaves just her underarms
Peter the pincushion peers back through the bars

C'mon everybody fuck what you know
At the Atomic Grind Show

Move your butt
Lose your nut
Break your mind out of its rut

Shock a man tattooed to his EZ chair
Eyes gone wide from the TV glare

Flip the switch
There's no hitch
Fry him only till he twitch

Pickled pig-boy punk makes you scream out loud
X-ray show from live outside of the younger crowd

C'mon everybody its a freak disco
In our Atomic Grind Show

Your the crowd
Gasp out loud
Stiff upper lip makes your mother proud

See a six-legged cow give six-legged milk
Burn victim's skin feels smooth as silk

Don't be mild
Freaks are wild
Can't change the channel you have dialed

Watch the bed of nails stick right through the skin
Complimentary parting gift but you must come in

Come on everybody its time to go
To the Atomic Grind Show!

Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling

Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling

It's a sweet shiny grill up in my teeth
Got a Bling-Bling mouth beyond belief
Fifty million dollar worth of James Bond fodder
Bling-Bling jaws don't rust in water

A platinum grill
Till I'm over the hill
Chewing Bar B Q up like a
Rototill, Rototill

I might be poor
Won't sell my caps
Maybe 3 or 4
Way in the back

Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling

Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling

Got a Bling-Bling chain and a watch to match
Bling-Bling rims get me Bling-Bling snatch
Bling-Bling condoms make a freak sing sing
Got a Bling-Bling stud in my ding-a-ling

A ding-a-ling
a ding ding-a-ling
Won't you play with my ding-a-ling ding-a-ling

My Ding-a-ling
They all want a piece
Bling-Bling Banging
Bling-Bling grease
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling

Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling

My Bling Bling needs cannot be met
Want an iced out hanger for my Bling Bling jet
Got a Bling Bling robot polish my Bling Bling
Want the Midas touch everything Bling Bling

It's not a curse
It's by belief
Bling Bling things bring Eternal peace, Eternal peace

I might be wrong
No going back
Only god could tell
Might not take me back

Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling

Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling
Bling Bling Bling Bling

I met a guy his name was Burton
When I met him my life started hurtin'
Cause he was hanging round my girlfriend flirtin'
Then he took her on home and started squirtin'

Oh Burton why you causin' me
All this pain and misery
Don't you know that I can see
That you've been checking her booty?

Burton why you causing me this hurtin'?
Your hanging round is mighty disconcertin'
If you don't stop your flirtin' and pervertin' Burton
It'll be the curtains for me that's for certain
Why you causing all this hurtin' Burton?

A couple years later something certain
Things didn't turn out well for Burton
Some other guy was hanging out a flirtin'
And he dragged her on home and started squirtin'

Oh Burton it is plain to see
You fucked it up for you and me
I hope a girl that just like she
gives you a bad case of VD

Burton why you causing me this hurtin'?
Your hanging round is mighty disconcertin'
If you don't stop your flirtin' and pervertin' Burton
It'll be the curtains for me that's for certain
Why you causing all this hurtin' Burton?

Hey now Burton
Why you causing me
All of this hurtin'?

Mean ol' Burton!

I'm not afraid of knives
How sweet is their slice
I'm not afraid of fire
It's a burning desire

So please stay away
Cause I'm only afraid of meat

Black widows in their web
Soothe me into bed
Crows cawing in the night
Fill me with such delight

But please stay away
Cause I'm only afraid of meat

From the butcher shop down stairs I hear the screaming
All through the night
Is this heaven am I dreaming
Hungry for a bite

Through the door and down the stair
Fingers through your hair
Sip of wine before we dine
Glass of red should suit you fine

But please stay away
Cause I'm only afraid of meat

I was walking with my dog just the other day
Minding my own business when his ball rolled away
Fido chased that ball as it rolled into a sewer
When up jumped a mean ole crazy evil doer

Fido started running and I wasn't far behind
Because I knew I was pursued by a terror mastermind
With his anthrax and a dirty bomb I had no place to hide
As he approached he screamed a prayer of holy suicide

I've got a plan to kill your town
Knock suspension bridges down
Gas your dog in the name of god
A media sponsored sham jihad

Here they come they're gonna get you
Put their botulism in ya
Tape your windows watch your neighbors
Orange alert for terror

Look out watch out
Better run evil doer gonna get ya

Look out watch out
Better run evil doer gonna get ya

I was shopping for some duct tape at my local IGA
And a box of chocolate donuts and a tub of fresh Parkay
Munching on a sample of reconstituted cheese
When an evil doer jumped up from a bag of groceries

He chased me past the canned goods and the aisle full of chips
I feared his evil scheming food supply apocalypse
I tripped on luncheon meat and tumbled to the floor
The evil doer spoke as I fumbled toward the door

Rummy and Dub can't save you now
There's VX nerve gas in your chow
Check out line to Shangri-la
Come eat at chez al-Qaeda

Here they come they're gonna get ya
With their nukes from north korea
Special package for Dan Rather
Red alert for terror

Look out watch out
Better run evil doers gonna get ya

Look out watch out
Better run evil doers gonna get ya

So don't you ever trust your neighbor
And don't ever thank a stranger
Cause they just might be an evil doer
And put your health in danger
If you see something with which W might not agree
Call your friendly operator at homeland security

Look out watch out
Better run evil doers gonna get ya

Look out watch out
Better run evil doers gonna get ya

Look out watch out
Better run evil doers gonna get ya

Look out watch out
Better run evil doers gonna get ya

Muahahahahahahahahahahaha

Here I come Im gonna get ya
Red alert for terror

Sweaty dancer at the gothic hot spot
Tonight she's Miss New York
Pale skin flashes, Jagermeister glow
She's Miss Six-o-six

White go-go boots, she's the life of the party
She's everybody's girl
Check out the tiki with victorian sloe
She's Miss Six-o-six

She's Miss Six-o-six
I saw her at the seven-eleven
It took me twelve whole days just to see her again
She's Miss Six-o-six

Underwater kiss on top of a streetlight
She really makes you shine
I'll take the swing ride on the outside row
She's Miss Six-o-six

She's Miss Six-o-six
I saw her at the seven-eleven
It took me twelve whole days just to see her again
She's Miss Six-o-six

Get out of work at a quarter to five
Roll up my sleeves and loosen my tie
I can't wait 'til I get home
To the comfort of my brownstone

I'll take the train 'cause my car's in the shop
It shouldn't be hard, just a couple of stops
What's the worst thing that could happen to me?
"Oh Christ! I just sat in pee!"

Stuffed inside like a sardine can
Stinky mother-fuckin' homeless man
Two beggars sing a rancid duet
I'm not even half way home yet

It's hot as hell but there's no AC
Gotta conserve electricity
They've raised the fare but they must need more
'Cause only one side opens on the sliding door

The MTA is always late
If you're in a hurry you'll have to wait
Might as well walk and save your bucks
Like the crazy man says,
The MTA Sucks!

The next stop's mine but it's running express
A vicious scream might relieve my stress
If I'm late again then I'll be canned
And I'll be the stinky homeless man

I learned my lesson on that sordid day
Mass transit reeks of human decay
If you want to get from point A to point B,
Just remember these words you don't have to thank me

The MTA is always late
If you're in a hurry you'll have to wait
Might as well walk and save your bucks
If you get on that train you'll be shit out of luck

The MTA sucks!!!

The best way to get over someone else
Get another body under you
Best way to get over somebody
Is to get under someone new
I still haven't gotten over
Sweet old underhanded you

I get my medication over the counter
In a brown paper sack
I get my over the counter medication
In a plain brown paper sack
Ten spot slot under bullet proof window
Can of coke, fifth of jack

I'm going over her house
I only know one way
I am going over to her house
But I only know one way
Guest room's under new management
There's a big house where I'm a stay

I'm gonna get me my over under 12 gauge
I'll only need a shell or two
I'm gonna to get me my over under 12 gauge shotgun
'Cause I'll only need a shell or two
That slug'll hit him right in the back of his head
But I'll be aiming straight through you

Zit-titted weasel woman making me hot
Come get with me drop off the tot
Lets take a spin in your SUV
Throw out that kiddie seat and make room for me

You shouldn't be walking that stroller alone
Your skinny butt begs for my bone
Drop off that stroller let me inside
I'll take you on a futon coaster ride

Park Slope Mamma
Gonna christen your yoga mat
Park Slope Mamma
Gonna show you where your chakra's at

If you take me park slope mamma to your brownstone tonight
Then Park Slope Mamma
You know I'm gonna love you right
Out in the garden weeding your plants
Checking out the bulge in your contractors pants
Triangle magazine ain't wedged in my pants
I got a brand new mantra to add to your chants

Shot of wheat grass and an energy bar,
No need to pack a bag 'cause we aren't going far.
Juanita's watching your children today.
Let's play an adult game of human bidet

Park Slope Mamma
Gonna christen your yoga mat
Park Slope Mamma
Gonna show you where your chakra's at

If you take me park slope mamma to your brownstone tonight
Then Park Slope Mamma
You know I'm gonna love you right

I'm gonna buy you a spirrulina bagel

The Rat King and his money
Of which he has a ton-y
Have bought the heart of Brooklyn

A city sanctioned land grab
To build his glorious prefab
Approved by friends on the in

It takes some money
And some good buddies
To tear down a filthy ghetto
And build a glorious sparkling Xanadu

When the Rat King builds his outlet
We'll shop with out a regret
Painting the city bright red

Fast food, CDs, Taffy
Phones that photography
Stuff that's good for your head

Eminent splendor
For shopping vendors
The Rat King's Hall of plenty
A domain for our free trade Xanadu

We'll all be so happy
When the Rat King Builds all his crappy

The Walrus Man eats chicken and biscuit
Till the juice runs down his chin
Easy cheese and biscuit chicken
Pollo de la heroin

Walrus mustache
Dripping crumbs
Smells of cigaretted stubs
The walrus man knows all gin joints are half a pint away from sin

The Walrus Man hangs in the back
Of his favorite fast food spot
Pissing day old spanish coffee
Comes back steaming' hot

Walrus trousers
Zipping up
Gonna get another cup
The walrus man knows Balthazar's ain't never gonna let him in

I am the Walrus Man walking down your street
I have a pleasant smile for everyone I meet
I need some alcohol to get me through the day
Do you have a dime for me
Or a quarter
For me today

The Walrus Man gets rousted
by the local constabulary
cars with horns and sirens screaming
a tintinnabulary

Officer McCracky
With the gout
Gonna throw the walrus out
The Walrus Man he knows Bellevue serves dinner a quarter to three

I am the Walrus Man walking down your street
I have a pleasant smile for everyone I meet
I need some alcohol to get me through the day
Do you have a dime for me
Or a quarter
Or a dollar
For me today

Flat-footed walrus man trundles down a crowded New York City street
Tusks gleaming in an impossible blue moonlight
Good night Mr. Walrus Man

I'm not your man
I'm not your daddy
Not your thing on the side
I'm not your priest
I'm not your shrink
Don't want to hear you confide

I'm not your late night lover or your gigolo
Not gonna take it slow when the lights go low

I'm not your friend
I'm not your buddy
Wanting a bigger piece or you
I'm not your mailman
Or UPS guy
No fantasy come true

I'm not your friend with benefits hanging round
Not the teenage kid from the bad part of town

I'm your XXX

I'm not your boy
I'm not your screw
Ain't a bisexual fling
I'm not your toy
Don't play with you
Not a on the weekend thing

Some kind of new age loving this sure ain't
I make you scream so loud it peels back the paint

I'm your XXX

It's like a virus
It's like a fever
It's worse then nicotine
I am a cure
I'm a reliever
I'm exactly what you need

I know the symptoms you demonstrate
No cure is coming from your brand new mate

I'm your XXX